In trying to keep myself upbeat, I want to talk a bit about The Alchemist, a really lovely book that has been compared to The Little Prince, another simple, lovely, allegorical novel. The Alchemist is one of those used-book-sale-at-the-library purchases -- reminder to self, renew your library books so you don't have another obscene fine -- and I'm so glad that it was a recommendation for my project.
I'm not a huge fan of self-help books, so I prefer to get my life lessons through fiction. The Alchemist is really about what each of our purposes is throughout life: our Personal Legends, as it is called in the novel. Our Personal Legends is determined by fate, but it is up to each of us to follow the path, or to ignore the messages from out heart. The main character gives up everything he has always known to follow a path set forth in a dream. Along the way he meets people who help him on his quest, but it is always through struggle, and it never comes easily.
One of my favorite messages (or storylines, depending on how literal you want to take this) from the novel is about the heart; the boy (our main character) attempts to communicate with his heart, and begins to understand how things work:
"Everyone on earth has a treasure that awaits him," his heart said. "We, people's hearts, seldom say much about those treasures, because people no longer want to go in search of them. We speak of them only to children. Later, we simply let life proceed, in its own direction, toward its own fate. But, unfortunately, very few follow the path laid out for them -- the path to their Personal Legends, and to happiness. Most people see the world as a threatening place, and, because they do, the world turns out, indeed, to be a threatening place.As we grow up, according to the heart, we don't want to be reminded of our Personal Legends, because it's too upsetting to realize we've not achieved what we secretly (or, perhaps, not so secretly) desire. Occasionally we don't even know what would make us happy because we aren't willing to experiment. Other times, we are willing to make jokes about the things we want in a facade of our own emotions. And, more often than not, we simply just push those dreams to the side in the face of 'real life.'
"So, we, their hearts, speak more and more softly. We never stop speaking out, but we begin to hope that our words won't be heard: we don't want people to suffer because they don't follow their hearts."
"Why don't people's hearts tell them to continue to follow their dreams?" the boy asked the alchemist.
"Because that's what makes a heart suffer most, and hearts don't like to suffer."
From then on, the boy understood his heart. He asked that it, please, never to stop speaking to him. He asked that, when he wandered far from his dreams, his heart press him and sound the alarm. The boy swore that, every time he heard the alarm, he would heed its message. (Coelho, 131-2)
Once upon a time, I had a dream to be a writer. And, although I occasionally update my blog and I do keep a writer's journal, I realized very early on that was not a logical dream. I don't have the talent, the resources, or the lifestyle for that type of adventure. Or do I? Am I just giving myself excuses, so that I won't feel regret about never trying?
My first grad class was about writing memoir, and the feedback I received from the other students (and my professor) was part of what encouraged me to at least start this blog. Unfortunately, in most areas of my life, I tend to ignore my heart, and play it safe. And, to a certain extent, I don't know if I ever have a true comprehension of what my Personal Legend might be.
I'm trying to take the negativity and turn it instead to my search. My new goal: relax, and say yes. I need to be calm and take everything that comes to me as a possible part of my personal legend and my path. And perhaps this blog isn't a bad start.What is your personal legend? And how will you achieve it?
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